#655 - 2015-11-24

Patrick: I've just been asked to upload a .war file Patrick: .war?! What is it good for? Absolutely nothing. I'll say it again.

#653 - 2015-11-23

James: Ahh I love Portsmouth... but I couldn't live here again Evie: A bit like your mother I guess... Evie: Good for visits, but you wouldn't want to be in her again

#652 - 2015-11-18

James: What would you say about a picnic snuggles in the back of the Land Rover with a KFC tonight before the cinema? :D No resteraunts, loud noises, bright lights and crap service, just snuggles and junk food? :) Evie: Yesyesyesyesyesyesyesfuuuuuuckyeeeeeees Evie: You had me at snuggles, I lost my panties at KFC :p

#651 - 2015-11-18

Byron: AOE2 [Age of Empires 2] ruled! James: It still does wink emoticon An expansion came out for it last week. Ken: Seriously? They still support AOE2?? James: Yeah dude, it was a full expansion too, they added like 3 new races and loads of fixes! Byron: But still no ISIS?

#650 - 2015-11-13

James: Yeah, and you could enter into a conversation like this; James: SYN! James: (now you say, SYNACK!) Patrick: SYNACK James: ACK! Patrick: You're a super nerd, right? Patrick: You must have some outrageous parties Patrick: Do you just leave the UDP guy knocking at the door? :D

#649 - 2015-11-09

Andy: People's problems are relative of course, but it helps to have perspective. And sometimes you just want to write that perspective on the palm of your hand and deliver the message at speed.

#648 - 2015-11-09

E: what's more gross than ordering a bloody mary? E: ordering a bloody mary and putting a tampon in it before serving it to a friend

#647 - 2015-11-08

Robin: Why don't babies have log files? How are you supposed to know what the error is?!

#646 - 2015-11-04

Emma: Eating turkey in the form that isn't a dinosaur, I'm a real adult now.

#645 - 2015-10-27

Colleague 1: If it hurts do it more. Other Colleagues: *Lots of raised eye brows* Colleague 1: Only in Dev Ops, not in real life. Colleague 1: You lot are terrible, your heads all went to dirty places.

#644 - 2015-10-26

Chris: Or we could plug the RJ45 cable into the RJ45 socket and it can all "just work" like Apple promised, right? Mark: YOU SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTH

#642 - 2015-10-20

"For you aural pleasure"

(in an advert for headphones)

#641 - 2015-10-20

Andy: hey James, our meeting - can we push it til tomorrow? Today I have the plague.

#640 - 2015-10-13

Stu: Hehe I just passed to you in the standup, and you and Neil both vanished simultaneously Stu: So I'm assuming either network troubles or raptor invasion

#639 - 2015-10-13

A bit later on... A untitled meeting invite arrives requiring the entire team in a meeting room without explanation.

Stu: That's an ominous meeting Neil: Very ominous Cari: How bad could it be, right? Neil: Maybe we've sparked a raptor-readiness planning meeting? Stu: Step 1: Don't look like a leaf-eater