#549 - 2015-01-08

Sam: Previous developers were weapons-grade retards

#538 - 2014-12-06

There have been 113526 failed attempts since your last login.

#488 - 2014-05-13

Michael: And no doubt you think your correct about everything. Shocker! James Cheeseright: *you're

#474 - 2014-03-29

Did you know they don't call it mental arithmetic any more? They call it personality disorder algebra. - Jeremy Hardy

#463 - 2014-03-22

Andy: I'm putting "stay 29" on my list of things to do before I'm 30

#460 - 2014-03-17

User: Can I have some electric string which connects you to the internet? IT: You mean some cat5? User: Yes, that's the stuff.

#655 - 2015-11-24

Patrick: I've just been asked to upload a .war file Patrick: .war?! What is it good for? Absolutely nothing. I'll say it again.

#598 - 2015-05-05

James: json2yaml? Jim: yaml2json? Si: yaml2pdf?! Andy: Knight to Kings Bishop 3

#585 - 2015-03-27

cmilsted: yeah - I am as confused as a chameleon in a bag of skittles

#569 - 2015-02-18

Mark: Pop tarts?! The fun alternative to breakfast!

#560 - 2015-02-09

Hi, I’d like to hear a TCP joke. Hello, would you like to hear a TCP joke? Yes, I’d like to hear a TCP joke. OK, I’ll tell you a TCP joke. Ok, I will hear a TCP joke. Are you ready to hear a TCP joke? Yes, I am ready to hear a TCP joke. Ok, I am about to send the TCP joke. It will last 10 seconds, it has two characters, it does not have a setting, it ends with a punchline. Ok, I am ready to get your TCP joke that will last 10 seconds, has two characters, does not have an explicit setting, and ends with a punchline. I’m sorry, your connection has timed out. Hello, would you like to hear a TCP joke?

#558 - 2015-02-07

The only problem with the UDP joke is I'm not sure if anybody got it.

#553 - 2015-01-26

jenny: Jest checking. jenny: I'll put my rape alarm away then. james: Don't flatter yourself. jenny: FANKS

#546 - 2014-12-26

Andy: Java memory management is like walking around the house eating a crumbly biscuit and having a maid walk around after you with a hoover :)

#543 - 2014-12-22

alice: What would you do if I ran across the room at you with this knife? bob: Well, I'd just probably assume the position, and half the men in this room would get an erection.